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On Being Alone

2012 November 2

I read a Tweet or Facebook comment or something recently where the person was anxious because it was her first time out for dinner in a restaurant alone. How sad, I thought, you have really missed out.

You see, I have always been a person who is fine being alone. In fact, I often relish it, especially now with two kids when I rarely get to do it. It started out in my late teens/early 20s when I realized there was a certain strength, a certain confidence I would get from choosing to do something solo – even when I could have called up a friend/boyfriend/family member to do it with me – and then actually enjoying it.

My favorite things to do alone?

A movie. There’s something so calming about taking your time to pick your seat, nibble on your snack and absorb a film (and your opinion of it in the end) on your own.

A walk is a close second. I am happy to roam solo with my thoughts and the rhythm of my footsteps ahead of me.

Working out. I don’t want to go with anyone, ever. I like to focus on my panting in private.

Shopping. I don’t need a second opinion at this stage, I know what I like and what works on me, so it’s easier (and frankly more fun) to go it alone.

Mani/pedi. I consider this a sacred hour of quiet time. The only thing I want with me is a stack of magazines.

Breakfast or lunch. I don’t love eating dinner in a restaurant by myself because those meals always seem to be more social, but it’s so pleasant to grab a coffee or a sandwich solo. I usually bring along a book or magazine if I know I am going to be dining sans companion, but also find the time to take in my surroundings. People watch, see what others are ordering, absorb the design and atmosphere of the restaurant…it’s calming, interesting, fun, and you don’t have to share dessert πŸ˜‰

What do you like to do solo?

8 Responses leave one →
  1. November 2, 2012

    I had to learn being alone. I was petrified of it. Now, I relish it, but find I have to force myself into being disconnected to get “There.” I, too, love coffee, breakfast, lunch, and even dinner alone, and, of course, the mani-pedi hour. But my absolute, all-time-favorite? A book. Reading alone. Which, if you ask me, isn’t really alone. You have all those characters, you know.

  2. November 2, 2012

    I love that quote.
    I love this post.

    What’s more, I love to be alone.

    I’m a loner at heart. These days, alone time is fleeting. It’s minutes, not hours. It’s moments, often, not much more.

    I think alone time is the best gift a mom can get!

    ~ d.

    • WWGD permalink*
      January 9, 2013

      Yes! So sorry for the delayed reply, your comment got blocked in spam and just found its way out. Thanks for sharing!

  3. November 2, 2012

    I love it too, sometimes a little too much. It’s just so nice to do what your little heart desires without worrying about another person’s schedule, likes or tastes. I’ve always enjoyed being alone. For me I think it comes from being an only child. I had a fabulous date with myself last Friday. I drove around, took myself to a great lunch, got a little shopping in. It really recharged my batteries. Cheers to being loners πŸ™‚

  4. November 5, 2012

    When I was a Senior in HS, all, and I do mean ALL of my friends had boyfriends that they were truly madly deeply in love with, so if I didn’t start doing things on my own, I wouldn’t have done them. I’ll never forget the first time going to a movie alone, and I felt like everyone on the line was looking at me, I was too young to realize that nobody cared. I started going into The Village in NYC alone when my go-to city gf was busy with her boyfriend, and I realized how lovely it was to walk at my pace, go into any store I wanted, or not, and just be released from the burden that I put on myself to try to make sure everyone around me is happy.

    I love company, when it’s the right person, but I also love my independence. And I don’t want to work out with anyone else either!

  5. November 6, 2012

    The first movie I went to by myself was Life is Beautiful. It was early December; an afternoon showing. I was so profoundly moved by the film (really, who wasn’t?) that I just sat there in my thoughts for awhile. When I left the theatre, I came out into an empty downtown Ottawa (typical on Saturday afternoons) being covered with the most gloriously FAT snow flakes. The whole experience is one that I still feel I can remember moment for moment. Needless to say, since then, I adore going to movies solo.

    • WWGD permalink*
      January 9, 2013

      Lori! This comment got blocked in spam ages ago but was so lovely, I had to reply. Growing up in Montreal, I know that EXACT sensation (though the city was rarely empty, it would just quieten down perfectly in the snow) and it’s the ideal moment of solitude! Love it, thanks for sharing.

  6. November 8, 2012

    I love this quote. I have done all of the activities you mention above by myself at one point or another in my life. In fact, even today I prefer to do most of those things alone. I just think better when I’m alone. πŸ™‚

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